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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened.  It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.  ~Mark Twain

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.  ~Sam Ewing

Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier.  ~Dan Bennett

Never raise your hand to your kids.  It leaves your groin unprotected.  ~Red Buttons

Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown.  ~Author Unknown

Sexy Rib Tattoos For Girls 2011

A tattoo for the rib cage is very special and you will therefore need to

Sexy Rib Tattoos For Girls 2011

Rib Tattoos For Girls 2011

Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat.  Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound.  Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together.  Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.  ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968

We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.  ~Author Unknown

I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich.  ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter

A father is always making his baby into a little woman.  And when she is a woman he turns her back again.  ~Enid Bagnold

Rib tattoos are selected by women for a variety of reasons.

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Are we not like two volumes of one book?  ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore

You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.  ~Ogden Nash

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.  ~Jennifer Yane

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.  ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990

A father carries pictures where his money used to be.  ~Author Unknown

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You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience.  ~Author Unknown

May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown

Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament.  But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it.  ~Clarence Budington Kelland

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.  ~Robert Frost

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Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat.  Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound.  Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together.  Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.  ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.  ~Jennifer Yane

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.  ~Robert Frost

Are we not like two volumes of one book?  ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore

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Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.  ~Dinah Craik

I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now.  ~Author Unknown

In childhood, we yearn to be grown-ups.  In old age, we yearn to be kids.  It just seems that all would be wonderful if we didn't have to celebrate our birthdays in chronological order.  ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com

Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life.  ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities

They say that age is all in your mind.  The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body.  ~Author Unknown

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There is still no cure for the common birthday.  ~John Glenn

Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year:  The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again.  ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.  ~Jennifer Yane

May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown

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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.  ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.  ~Robert Frost

Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat.  Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound.  Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together.  Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.  ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968

Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat.  Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound.  Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together.  Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.  ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968

There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself.  ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994

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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.  ~Robert Frost

We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march.  ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.  ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.  ~Sam Ewing

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Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.  ~Truman Capote

It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge.  ~Phyllis Diller

When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.  But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.  ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)

Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier.  ~Dan Bennett

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I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich.  ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter

Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament.  But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it.  ~Clarence Budington Kelland

Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever.  ~Don Marquis

Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.  ~Truman Capote

Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat.  Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound.  Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together.  Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.  ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968

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Youth is a disease from which we all recover.  ~Dorothy Fulheim

I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now.  ~Author Unknown

A father carries pictures where his money used to be.  ~Author Unknown

There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself.  ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994

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The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.  ~Lucille Ball

When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.  But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.  ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)

Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier.  ~Dan Bennett

Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed.  ~Charles Schulz

You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.  ~Ogden Nash

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I'm sixty years of age.  That's 16 Celsius.  ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997

It kills you to see them grow up.  But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't.  ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams

Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life.  ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities

Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.  ~Dinah Craik

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There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself.  ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994

Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father!  ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.  ~Robert Frost

We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march.  ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881